Escaping reality

Why would someone want to escape reality ! Sounds dumb doesn't it but you'll still what could possibly make someone think like that and even if someone does escape reality where would one want to go? When one has no idea where they should go but want to escape in the very phenomena which is responsible for their sole existence but if I think deeply maybe I don't want to exist. I ask myself that and answer always ends up in someone else's fault but why should I the one paying price after all even if i want to escape reality, does that mean that no happiness or anything out there can fill the void which i feel inside me!
Sure there are wonderful things out there which provides the happiness in self but there also comes a time when all of this falls and I told to myself "Its a stupid thought, chill after a while everything will be fine and all you'll care about is going out and having good time its only for short time. Its just 'cerebrospinal fluid' in head messing up soon dopamine will cheer you up". But guess what for some people that thought never goes out mind and everytime I look at train coming up and that sensation you feel to just jump right ahead but never did that making excuse to myself that what about my loved ones or this is the excuse I make to hide the fact that I'm coward, am I?
Every time going out observing people makes you go ahead and want to laugh and have some good time but when tried sensation of fear takes over, before you can utter a single word your forehead is sweating and in all you are thinking what should I do to avoid this weird situation and somehow when out of that situation you plan that you'll never go ahead and do that afterall they maybe one laughing but in the end we all have same fate and its all about how we complete it. Me myself hide the fact that I'm a hypocrite. I maybe anti-social but all those little time i had with other people has made me realize that all of them are hypocrites, everyone hides their true face even knowing that their loved ones will still accept them the way they are, but still they want to structure them as someone who they're not and that simple common fact of everyone makes humanity stink.
Everyone thinks they can control themselves and not pretend to be someone who they're not, to quote Elliot from Mr. Robot "Control is about as real as a unicorn taking a leak at the end of a double rainbow. Control my friend is an Illusion". 
In the end I struggle and try to face my fears and will continue doing it because "If you truly want to escape reality, everyday life, you've got no other choice but to keep evolving"(from DURARARA!)
So what do you think ?
Do you want to escape reality ?
and most important Are you a hypocrite ?